Caitlin Banks

Obsession

(Poetic Prose)

You walk though the door. Once upon the time, this was your safe haven. Today, there is nothing here to welcome you but the stale air, cobwebs and a pile of unpaid bills. The sunlight entering your windows is not bright. It’s opaque and dull, casting a greyish tint upon your essence. Every corner of your own abode is mocking you as you slowly walk through, fatigue cracks on the walls reflecting your shattered core and the sound of the creaky floor resonating through your pain. You saw him through thick smoke, yet the image remains strong, haunting you. Everything you see now, you see through that transparent likeness. He has become an icon of your life, to whom you bestowed your thoughts, your deepest and darkest secrets. He is within and there is no escape.

You close your eyes and see him again, imagine that you were still there, watching him. There are serpents of deception on your stairway, hissing and spouting their forked tongues. The futility of your covet has become the only reality that you know. It hurts to breathe, knowing that every breath you take is another moment filled with misery. Your perception of life has changed. You try to lay down, but the pillows are no longer convivial; now all you see are four sharp edges, four devilish horns ready to stab through you existence and cause more pain.

You try to cry but your sobbing breaths just echo through the dry tear ducts like desert winds through an abandoned cave. Your body has become a warm mass filled with icy feelings and despair. There is nothing left for you in this world of harsh reality and unfulfilled dreams. Your hope is gone, yet your body still desire his closeness and with every passing moment, the more you yearn for his touches, the harsher the veracity of it extinguishes your burning desire. You have become an oxymoron, your worst nightmare.

In the distance, you hear soft bells, see light illuminating his smiling face. You try to focus on this moment and smile back, but the more you concentrate the more the figure gets distorted until his frown derides you and squashes every scintilla of happiness.

You went, you saw but you did not conquer. This should have turned differently. You thought it would, yet he disappeared behind the smoke and you never saw him again. His voice has become a part of you and the pain of the foregone conclusion is becoming too much to handle. You wonder why was he blind to your desires that so evidently radiated out of your pores.

Your cards have spoken. The queen of spades has murdered the white knight in cold blood. The mayhem in your head begins to dissipate, your knees weaken and you collapse. Your soul begins to combust, slowly smouldering away your will to live. It’s lonely, it’s hollow and you surrender. You close you eyes and welcome the eternal darkness.

Just ‘What If’

(This story contains sexually explicit content and it is not suitable for audience under the age of 18)

By clicking the link, you confirm that you are 18 years or older. Read the story here.  Just ‘What If’

Club Leather

This is the first story I’ve ever written. I recently reread it and while I would change a lot of things in it now, I am posting it in all its craptastic glory. Makes for an authentic experience. Hopefully, you are at least able to enjoy it somewhat.

(This story contains sexually explicit content and it is not suitable for audience under the age of 18)

By clicking the link, you confirm that you are 18 years or older. Read the story here. Club Leather

Ultimate Fantasy

Again, written ages ago. No, it was not inspired by Fifty Shades of Grey. I will probably never read this book. If you get through this story, you might understand why.

Which brings me to the warning for this one.
This story contains sexually explicit content, including, but not limited to bdsm (F/m), anal, consentual adultery and other content that may be quite disturbing to some audience. Reader’s discretion is advised and it is NOT recommended for anyone under the age of 18.

By clicking on this link, you confirm that you are at least 18 years of age . Read the story here. Ultimate Fantasy
This story was once disqualified from a contest as it did not have either ‘happily ever after’ or ‘happy for now’ ending. I would like to add that I have written a ‘happy for now’ ending, but cannot find it for some reason, but as soon as I do, I will post that as well.